Vacation from Vacation

Well I did it. I am an official PADI certified scuba diver. Based upon my previous scuba experience (once in Australia) I thought it was going to be a piece of cake….boy did I think wrong! The actual course is hard in and of itself but the fact that Phuket which is supposed to be a lovely, tropical place this time of year, was a rainy mess.

We arrived at the scuba place on the first day to be greated by out instructor…..Andre!! Dutch, 43, bald, built beautiful man! Whoo-hoo! Andre was just for us for the next 4 days…good times. The first day consisted of videos and quizzes which was fine since it was rainy and we thought the next day would be different.

Day 2: We arrive for our first in the water session only to be told that we had to be in the pool rather than the ocean since the water was so choppy. Nothing too exciting to report other than I was able to get into the wetsuit no problem and was actually complimented by Andre once suited up. The day went extremely well and we were excited by how well we did. We ended with many drinks on our terrace, then drinks at a little local bar where due to the weather all the lights went out in Kata beach for an hour so we sat, drank and learned Thai by candlelight. Once the lights came back on we headed out for dinner, drank another bottle of wine then headed to a massage place for some drunken spa at 10pm. We had a hour foot massage followed by an hour Thai massage and by the time it was over I was hung over!!!! All this for a mere $25USD

Day 3: We were booked on a boat out to an island about 1.5 hours off of Phuket where the water was clear and the sun shinning so we packed up all the equipment and boarded the boat…yeah it may have been pleasant there but the 1.5 hours of travel time was anything but. The weather was horrible. I seriously thought I was an extra in The Perfect Storm. Kids..this is not an exaggeration. There were about 15 other people on the boat and about 5 of them were just puking off the side the entire time. It was pretty gross. So we finally reach calmer waters and start suiting up for our first open water dive. I was really nervous but with Andre by our side things didn’t seem quite as scary.

We make our descent and it was really beautiful. There were all sorts of fish everywhere and the swim was pretty calming. We went about 12 meters for about 40 minutes but I was so nervous that I was doing everything right I never really enjoyed the scenery. About 15 minutes in I was thinking all these freakin fish look alike…ready to go back up. We again did really well so was feeling pretty confident about our scuba skills. We made our ascent and headed back to the boat for some lunch. Little did I know that my day was about to change….for the worse.

After lunch the beautiful weather of Phuket (NOT) made its way to our little sunny place and it started to rain. We got back into the water and were preparing to do some skill tests on the bottom. The test was to take out regulators (thing that allows you to breath underwater) out of our mouths, throw them behind our backs, find it then put it back in and start breathing again. No sweat did it in the pool….no problem. Not sure whether it was over confidence or I just was not thinking but I started the exercise, took the regulator out of my mouth, threw it behind and realized I have not taken a big enough breath…I got the thing back in my hand and just as I was about to get it back in my reflexes took over and I tried to take a breath…not tooo smart as I ended up with a mouth full of water and could not clear my regulator. I started to signal ASCENT! ASCENT! the thing would not clear and I was basically drowning (again no exaggeration here) so Andre started to bring me up and about ½ way up it cleared and I could taste the sweet taste of oxygen… Andre would not take his eyes off mine which was so calming…can you tell I fell in love with him heheh! We get to the surface and I was totally freaked!! I relaxed for a bit but had no desire to go back down. I knew if I did not I would never dive again so I asked for a minute and Andre said we would go for a swim underwater to calm me down and that I could hold his hand. Helen made me laugh after as she said she felt like a third wheel as we swam hand and hand. After a brief swim it was time to do it again and if I could not do this I would not pass. So, I peed my wetsuit and got into position and did the drill…Success! I did it!!! I was really freaking out.

As we swam back to the shore do you know what I was thinking…….I almost died… I am eating pasta tonight…seriously that is what I was thinking!! Who thinks that?????

Day 4: Back to the boat and I was not really into the whole thing as a result of day 3s experience but the weather was actually sunny which made it a bit easier to get out of bed. By this time both Helen and I were so beat up that we literally dragged ourselves to the shop.

Back to the boat and a much calmer trip to the reef. I assured Andre yesterday’s experience had not gotten me down too much and I was feeling confident I could complete the course. The next two dives were uneventful (thank god) and really beautiful AND to 18 meters/60 feet!!! The max an diver at our level could do! As we made our final ascent, Andre gave us a big group hug and oddly enough his *** was at eye level for me the whole time which Helen realized and made us both laugh so hard I almost lost the regulator once again.

Headed back and only the final written exam to go. As you already know, we passed the final exam and we were able to put our pictures on the wall of fame!

We celebrated with some beers and music with Andre…he was really proud!

Here I sit back in Singapore and my body has had enough even our last day which we filled with spa could make us feel any better.

So…need another vacation.